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I always believe that there are no parents who don't love their children. I always believe that my father still loves my sister, loves me and loves my sister in his heart, although he is seriously patriarchal. However, all he showed was respect and fear that made us flinch. How I long for parents and children to get along like friends, they can give us more family warmth and tolerance! My father is 62 years old. He and his mother got married in the spring of 1965. My elder sister was born in 1969, five years older than me, and I am seven years older than my elder sister! My mother and aunt have secretly found someone to show my father the horoscope several times. The fortune teller said that my father had a chance. I don't know if it's true fate or accidental coincidence. My father's son didn't live long, but his three daughters are thriving! Before giving birth to my sister, before giving birth to me, before giving birth to my sister, my mother gave birth to boys, but almost all of these boys died shortly after birth. The only one who lived longer was my brother who was born in 1978. At that time, my father doted on my brother as if he were a baby. It is always after my brother has had enough to eat and drink that it is our turn for the three sisters. He often buys new clothes for his brother, New Pants, but my three sisters always wear them after my sister wears them. If I don't wear them properly, I give them to my sister. Anyway, he just focused on his brother. It seems that all his three daughters are redundant. My peers have already entered school, and my father never cares about my future. I will be ten years old when I finally walk into school with my schoolbag on my back! Moreover, my aunt, 1984, worked in the forestry bureau and strongly urged my father to let me study. My aunt found a lucrative job as a contractor and took migrant workers to plant trees for her father. My father and mother clamored to take my brother with them. Unfortunately, that winter, my brother was hit by a military truck when crossing the road, and he had a cerebral hemorrhage on the spot. After two days of full rescue, he died! Mom and dad were heartbroken at the death of their younger brother, and the atmosphere at home became very dignified and suffocating. We three sisters were unhappy from then on. To tell the truth, we are equally heartbroken and sad about the death of my brother, but at that time, except for my sister, I was just eleven years old and my sister was only four years old. How many things can I understand and how much pain can I endure? Father was sent home by his aunt and the leader of the accident unit, and he was sad for his brother's death day and night. He cried or talked nonsense. Uncle, aunt, aunt, menstruation ... and many people in the village came to comfort his father, but it was useless. He even told those who came to comfort him that people were making fun of him and gloating over the loss of his son! People always don't know what to do When my father cried and called my brother's name, my sister pulled me and my sister in front of him and said to him, "Dad, people can't come back from the dead. Don't be so sad. Don't be angry. Lan Lan's brother is gone, and you still have our three sisters. We will be filial to you and your mother in the future ... "However, my father roared angrily," Don't be so sad. " What's the use of having you The three of you add up to light light blue! Go away, don't let me see you! ! ..... "In the later days, our three sisters didn't know what to do at home. When we silently help my mother with housework or review lessons with my sister under the leadership of my sister, my father will lose his temper and say, "Are all the people in the family dead?" ! The whole house is dead! "And when my sister and I accidentally make noises or hum nursery rhymes because of the playful nature of our children, my father will gnash his teeth and yell at us:" Light light blue is dead, you are happy! "You three junkers are all dead. Satisfied! ! ! ! ..... "Later, my father went out to make a living with the help of his aunts. He worked as a construction contractor, a medicine processor, a clothing store owner, etc. And he really made a lot of money outside. Every time he goes home from other places, he really goes home, so he earns enough face in front of his fellow villagers. It is precisely because of this, coupled with his natural good face, that his home becomes a gathering place for friends, relatives and neighbors every time he comes back. There are always guests at home every day. My mother and our three sisters can't feel the warmth of home except the fatigue of entertaining guests. He can't play cards and gamble slowly, but he is always on call every time the villagers ask him to participate. My mother and our sisters can see at a glance that whether the villagers ask him to play cards or participate in Jinhua gambling, they are actually partnering for the money in his pocket. They always let his father win the money first, but it was his father who lost a lot of money in the end! His mother advised him not to listen. He also said that his mother had long hair and short knowledge, and even thought that the villagers would frame him and forbid his mother to ask about his affairs. My sister and I carefully told others that they really designed it together for his money and advised him not to be fooled again, but he said, "It's no big deal! I'm in charge of Lao zi. I earned my money, and I can do whatever I want. It's good for me to feed and clothe you and study for you! I'm glad it's your turn to play cards with others ...... "So my father almost became an out-and-out gambler, lost a lot of money, and his heart slowly ignored business. My father's preference for his son has never changed. When I was admitted to junior high school, he insisted that I should not study. He asked me to go to Huaihua's clothing store with him to help him, so that he could spare more energy to run another processing factory. At that time, I got good grades and liked studying very much. He said, "What's the use of women reading? Sooner or later, you will get married, and how many books you read will eventually belong to others! Why should I waste money to send you to school in other people's homes? " I said to him irrationally, "since you are so patriarchal, I was born a woman." Why don't you step on me? " ! You didn't think I was a woman until now! ! ..... "In my father's impression, his three daughters were always passive in front of him and never dared to protest, so my father was so angry that his veins stood out and shouted to slap me. I rushed to him crying and said, "You hit it! You fight! Shoot me. Anyway, you never treat our sister as a daughter! "But he didn't hit me, because my uncle and some people in the village came and took him away. With my repeated insistence and the persuasion of my uncles, my father had to let me put on my schoolbag again and become a happy student. In the year when I graduated from junior high school, my family began to decline. My father couldn't stand the change of life and his natural temper and impatience. It made the business that was booming suddenly enter a dangerous situation. He doesn't listen to anyone's advice, such as his menstruation. At that time, it was difficult to borrow money. He insisted on borrowing 50,000 yuan from the rural credit cooperatives! In the rural areas of 9 1, 50,000 is not a small amount, and the interest that needs to be repaid every month is several thousand yuan. But my father thought he could make a comeback and pay off the borrowed debts. It's a pity that my father not only didn't make any money, but also lost all his money and owed a debt! My father, who disapproved of my study, found a reason not to allow me to set foot on campus again. Since then, I just graduated from junior high school, but I stumbled into the door of society at the age of 18. In 1993, although I was firmly opposed to working as a temporary worker in my aunt's city, my father entrusted me to work in Guangdong. He thinks that Guangdong is almost all ordinary people. 00 yuan. I have never traveled far alone, so I suddenly left my parents' side and the shelter of my relatives and came to a completely strange environment. Can't find a job, have no place to live, and starve. It took me more than half a month to finally work in a private electronics factory. The environment of the factory is extremely poor, the management is very harsh and the food is very bad. Coupled with the acclimatization, my body is full of itchy blisters and I always have a nosebleed. After working the night shift for half a month, my weight dropped from 106 kg when I first came out to 84 kg. I feel that walking all day is top-heavy, just like stepping on a cloud! I really wanted to go home at that time! But every letter from my father is the same topic. Today, I said that Zhang San, who was away from home in the village, sent 800 yuan home. Tomorrow, my cousin who came out two months earlier than me sent back 1000 yuan to my uncle. He told me to work hard outside and send some money home every month to pay his debts like them! I understand his anxiety about debt and his heavy responsibility. In the later days, I learned to report good news to my family instead of bad news. I always write to tell my family not to worry, all the hardships and tiredness of wandering outside are borne silently by myself! Finally, one day, I was sitting in the workshop at work and fainted in the dark! The doctor said that I was seriously anemic and had to rest, but when I asked my boss for a week's leave with my medical record, my boss dismissed me on the grounds that I had better rest for a long time! At that time, there was only one month before the Spring Festival, and many people were already planning to go home and reunite with their families. I want to go home like them. But I know I can't go back. I must find another job to make money to pay off my father's debts. With the help of my fellow villagers and colleagues who have been together for almost a year, I entered another electronics factory and became a member of the assembly line. It was the tenth day of the twelfth lunar month, only twenty days before the traditional Spring Festival. The other day, my colleague sent me a letter from my father. He said that I just came out this year, and I don't have much money. I shouldn't go back for the Spring Festival, because the fare for going home during the Spring Festival is many times higher than usual. He gave me time to go back, and the fare was not expensive. Although the days of wandering abroad are very bitter and tiring, my health has been poor, and my weight has dropped to about 70 pounds, but the sincere care of my friends and the enthusiastic help of my colleagues have also made me feel the warmth of true feelings! Later, after my classmates and fellow villagers who worked in the same factory returned to their hometown, they couldn't help telling my father about my physical condition. My mother and other relatives also unanimously asked my father to let me go home and rest for a while before going out to work to earn money. After the Spring Festival, my father wrote several letters asking me to ask for leave and go back to rest, but because I was working outside and touched someone else's bowl, I was responsible. For an operator who has not been in the factory for a long time, it is a difficult and impossible expectation to ask for leave to go home. In addition, I went out to work for more than a year, and I didn't send much money home. I was a little afraid to face my father when I went back. Therefore, I can never go back. Good memories, I hope you can spend every day happily. 2006-6-1 815: 21(cold star in lonely night)1[advertisement]: These ordinary things in ordinary life ... These ordinary things in ordinary life actually contain such deep and true love.