Venus: I have received three marriage certificates, 28 years for men and 26 years for women.

Edit | Cao Fang

Venus has received three marriage certificates in her life so far, the first time with a woman, the second time with a man, and the third time with the same man.

1990, Venus got married for the first time in new york. The bride is an American girl who is his classmate in dance school.

At this time, Venus is still a man, so it is "him".

Venus, 23, won the annual prize of the American International Dance Festival and became the chief choreographer. He lived a splendid life in new york and lived in a spacious and luxurious apartment.

Female classmate Ken Bolin also visited new york. Ken Bolin couldn't afford to rent a house in new york, so she asked to share it with Venus. Venus suddenly had a brainwave and made a condition with her:

"You can live in my house for free, but you must marry me. After we register for marriage, you live in a big house and I get a green card, which is the best of both worlds. "

Ken Bolin's boyfriend is also a classmate of Venus. Knowing this plan, he nodded without saying a word and praised Venus's cleverness and wit.

His girlfriend is going to marry another man, and he can clap his hands, which is too big.

Because everyone who knows Venus knows that he is not interested in girls, and he can only be good friends, and there will be no love at all.

Therefore, Kembolin's boyfriend is very relieved. He knows that this is a formal marriage and there can never be a husband and wife. Even for a long time, it can only give birth to sisterhood.

So, Venus and Ken Bolin got the marriage certificate under the witness of their boyfriends.

Venus was relieved that the marriage would not last long, but he never imagined that when he got married again after 15 years, "he" had become "her".

When she first got married, Venus was her husband. /kloc-in 0/5 years, she will become a wife.

Venus can become Venus because she has the courage to be fearless of all worldly eyes and has developed a fearless character, which is related to her being born in an enlightened family.

1967, Venus was born in a military family in Shenyang, Liaoning.

My mother is gentle and cheerful, and she can sing and dance well. My father is stable and silent, but not rigid and harsh. Venus's parents know how to respect their children and will not force her to suppress her nature.

At that time, Venus seemed to win at the starting line from birth, but fate played a joke on Venus and decided her chromosome without authorization, which made her take a detour for 28 years.

Venus felt that she should be a girl since she was a child. There are always many questions in her heart: why do you want to shave her short hair, why can't you wear a skirt, and why can you only go to the men's bathhouse? ...

Venus's greatest childhood wish was to be "Snow White". She fantasized that she would wake up and become a girl, or be struck by lightning while walking on the road and "swish" to change her gender.

Unconsciously, Venus entered puberty. Like most people, she was the seed of love in her teens.

16 years old, Venus fell in love with others for the first time. That's her monitor in the military art dance class, a boy.

The monitor is tall and handsome, and Venus, who is not tall, is always used to looking up at him. Although the monitor has always been very gentle with her, he even puts her on the shoulder from time to time and calls her brother.

However, Venus understands that once this feeling is said, it is "death by sight", and the other party not only refuses to associate with her, but even does not make friends.

So she chose to swallow her feelings silently. Venus will still be timid and hesitant at this time, because she has not really become strong.

Shortly after he was admitted to military art, Venus became the best dancer in the school. 1985, shortly after graduating from military art, Venus won the gold medal of Li Tao Cup with his first "toe dance for men".

Then, she visited overseas for many times on behalf of the song and dance troupe, and became famous in the dance world.

During 1988, when Venus was studying modern dance in Guangdong Dance School, a sudden opportunity became an important turning point in her future life.

At the age of 2 1, Venus was recommended by the school to study modern dance in the United States. She can not only learn from the famous modern dancer Louis, but also get a full scholarship without paying any tuition.

Venus cherishes this opportunity very much. She really wants to go abroad, feel the overseas artistic atmosphere and accept more artistic edification.

Because she began to study English seriously very late, Venus has generously admitted many times that her English pronunciation is not standard and her accent is very strong, but she will not feel inferior.

On the contrary, this overseas trip made her more confident.

Venus once said in an interview that walking on the streets of Europe and America, she can turn her head 200%!

Because at that time, Europeans and Americans had never seen a yellow person who exuded confidence from the inside out like her.

Confidence comes from her talent and strength. No matter where you go to study or perform, Venus will always be the most dazzling and capable person.

Stepping into a foreign land, Venus found that people are not so secretive about homosexuality. Although not everyone can accept homosexuality, at least many people allow homosexuality to exist.

Venus realized that she could honestly show her true self. So she grew shoulder-length hair and began to talk about love bravely.

1990, Venus, 23, talked about "true love" for the first time.

Venus has had a soft spot for tall men since The Seeds of Love. Her first boyfriend, Rick, is a big man nearly 2 meters high.

Venus went to Texas to perform with the dance company. After the performance, she went to the bar to celebrate with her colleagues and friends.

Suddenly, she found a pair of eyes staring at herself in the crowd. Venus followed her eyes and saw a tall European and American man with glasses.

Although it looks calm on the outside, Venus is actually quietly drumming in her heart. In case this person has bad intentions, they are very different in size, so I'm afraid I can't beat him. ...

Just as Venus was thinking about how to get out of danger, the tall and strong man spoke in a very gentle tone and attitude. He invited Venus to drink and chat with him.

A few days later, Corey became Venus' boyfriend.

To Venus' surprise, Ray said that he was not gay, and he was attracted to Venus because he thought Venus was actually a girl.

This sentence is of great significance to Venus, and even greatly affects her later life.

When they first began to fall in love, Venus and Corey, like many lovers in love, missed each other day and night and were inseparable.

In order to see Cory every day, Venus even gave up her job in new york and moved to Texas to live with Cory. She even made plans to give up her career and dreams for love.

This may be the most "brain-loving" thing Venus has ever done in her life.

When she lived with Corey, Venus lived a leisurely and isolated life. She studies recipes and cleans at home every day, and when Corey comes home, she tells her about her troubles at work and what happened around her.

Venus enjoyed it at first, because she finally experienced the feeling of being a wife. But gradually, the housework day after day made her feel boring, and the boredom of life began to surface.

Life cannot be without love, but life cannot be without love.

A few months later, the thunder Lord broke up with her, not because he didn't love her, but because he wanted Venus to return to the stage, where she really should be, and continue to shine.

This is a feeling that can't be forgotten. It is treasured by Venus in a memory album and can't be forgotten for a long time, because Lei was the first man to read her heart.

Back in new york, Venus is still the chief dancer who attracts much attention, and the time of "singing with lesbians" seems to be just a dream.

For a long time, clay occupied an important position in the heart of Venus. She can't extricate herself for a long time, and she will unconsciously look for his shadow when walking in the street.

To her surprise, she will get married soon after returning to new york.

Venus's dance career in new york is in full swing, and many people around her suggest that she settle here in the future and try to get a green card.

It has always been difficult to apply for a green card in the United States, especially in those days. Even though Venus is the elite at the top of the dance pyramid, it is not easy to apply for a green card.

Just then, the opportunity came.

Venus and female classmate Ken Bolin planned a "fake marriage". After getting the marriage certificate, Kembolin moved into Venus' big apartment in new york.

The Immigration Bureau knocks on her door every so often to see if they still live together, to test whether they are really husband and wife, and to ask for some family information.

Venus and Kembolin prepared materials in advance and memorized each other's growth experiences, family members, living habits and so on. Every time the Immigration Bureau visits, they are "questioned".

The most unacceptable thing is that you can't leave the United States for four years from the day you apply for a marriage certificate.

But Venus often goes to Europe to perform. Is it necessary for her to give up her freedom and career and become a caged bird for a green card?

With Venus's unrestrained personality, she certainly couldn't stand such mandatory regulations, and soon she made up her mind: don't worry about this broken green card!

She gave up applying for an American green card, so she didn't have to pretend to be husband and wife with Ken Bolin. Not long after, Venus was invited by Italian national television to do choreography at the TV station, and officially parted ways with Kembolin.

Venus originally thought that according to local laws, as long as the separation time exceeds 7 months, it will be automatically judged as divorce.

The child's game-like marriage was soon forgotten by Venus. It was not until ten years later that Kembolin called her and asked for a divorce that she remembered that she still had a "wife".

Ken Bolin said on the phone that she is pregnant now and wants to get a marriage certificate with her current boyfriend, only to find that she is still a "married woman".

Venus was performing in Thailand at that time. When she got a call from Ken Bolin, she quickly went to the embassy to go through the divorce formalities. She never wants to ruin other people's happy lives because of her immature behavior.

In 2000, Venus had a sex change operation. The staff of the embassy gave her a look and asked, "Why did you and your husband divorce?" ? Emotional discord? "

The other party takes it for granted that his marriage partner is a man.

After completing the formalities, Venus felt inexplicably comfortable, and her steps became extraordinarily light, because she finally bid farewell to the "historical problems" of her male period.

1993, Venus, who successfully studied abroad, chose to return to China for development. Two years later, she brought a sensational news to the whole country-she wanted to change sex.

"Becoming a girl" is Venus's wish since childhood. Even if she became an all-around dancer and a famous dancer, this wish never changed.

Gender is determined from birth, and it was impossible to change your gender before.

However, with the development of medical technology, Venus found that this is no longer an idiotic dream, but a possibility, which only requires enough courage and a little cost.

1995, Venus went home and solemnly told her parents that she wanted to have sex-change surgery. She originally thought that her parents' thoughts were more traditional, and they would treat each other gently even without strict language barriers.

As a result, mother Venus was very calm. She had long guessed that one day, she said to Venus, "Whether you are a boy or a girl, you are my child."

Next, the father of Venus. When he heard Venus's words, he lit a cigarette silently. It took him half a century to finish this cigarette.

Finally, he silently stubbed out the cigarette butt, raised his eyes and looked at Venus and said, "Finally, congratulations."

The understanding and support of her family is very important to Venus, and then she can boldly embark on this adventure without any worries.

Knowing that Venus was going to have sex-change surgery, director Bird contacted her and offered to make a film "Miss Venus" for her to record her whole process of sex change and psychological process.

"Venus transsexuality" became a hot topic for countless people in that year. Some people think that she is making a movie because of sex-change surgery, grandstanding and attracting attention.

Venus shrugged off these questioning and abusive voices: "I didn't do anything dirty." I have nothing to be ashamed of! " "

Since I have decided to be a woman, I will not be afraid of gossip or care about others' pointing fingers.

On April 5th, 1995, Venus was pushed onto the operating table in Beijing Xiangshan Hospital.

16 hours later, Venus woke up in her hospital bed and the doctor told her that there were good news and bad news.

The good news is that the sex-change operation was successfully completed, and she is a woman now.

The bad news is that the nurse accidentally pressed the medical instrument on her left leg during the operation. After 16 hours of operation, all the muscles and nerves in her left leg were necrotic. She may never dance again.

After knowing this result, many people ridiculed her: "Look, if you need surgery to become a woman, you can't even dance now. Is it worth it? "

Many people think that Venus will be defeated by this result. They can only say that they are not familiar with Venus. She is a person who will never be crushed by fate.

At this point, Venus has crossed many ditches that ordinary people dare not touch, and she will never allow herself to bow to fate.

Venus was completely numb and unable to move in her left leg, and was rated as a second-class disability. It only took more than eight months for her to stand on the stage and dance freely again.

Even the doctor was surprised and said that her experience was a miracle.

Venus's greatest childhood dream finally came true. It's time to be a mother, she thought happily.

In 2000, Venus adopted her first child, Dudu.

After the successful transsexual operation, Venus expressed her desire to adopt a child, and hoped that her mother would help her take care of her.

On this day, Venus's mother went to the hospital to visit her old comrades-in-arms, and there was a sudden commotion outside the ward.

It turned out that a young girl in obstetrics and gynecology had just given birth to a baby boy, but the father of the child was unwilling to take responsibility. She is unable to support her children and wants to find a reliable family in the hospital and entrust her son to them.

Many people in the hospital are willing to adopt him. However, the girl went to Venus' mother's bed and held the child in her arms.

Soon after, Venus received a phone call from her mother: "Congratulations, you are a mother!" " "

After receiving this child, Venus felt that her life had entered a new chapter, and her face was full of happiness that could not be concealed. Venus nicknamed him "DuDu".

Later, Venus adopted a son and a daughter one after another. At this time, Venus did not think that her child would have a father.

In 2004, Venus flew to perform at home and abroad as usual. One day, a tall and thin German man sat next to her. The man took the initiative to chat with her and introduced himself as Hans.

A few days later, Hans began to pursue her. Venus was very fond of him, but she had to take precautions with him in advance: "You may not know that I used to be a man."

According to Venus's previous preference for boyfriends, Hans is not her "dish". She likes people who are tall and strong, full of masculinity and exude male hormones.

Although Hans is tall, he looks thin and weak, more like a scholar.

Before meeting Hans, Venus had a boyfriend who was dating. After deciding to accept Hans' courtship, she decided to break up with her boyfriend Pascal.

Because she thinks ex-boyfriends are only suitable for lovers, and Hans is a man suitable for marriage.

After hearing the reason why Venus broke up, Pascal said that he wanted to meet Hans. If you think he's going to fight Hans, it's all wet.

Pascal invited Hans for a drink. Like Venus' relatives, he wanted to test Hans' reliability and charm.

Time flies with a glass of wine. Pascal went back to Venus and told her, "This is a good man and worth marrying."

On February 1 2005, Venus and Hans got married, which caused another sensation in China.

Many people assert that their marriage will not last long. Unexpectedly, a year later, the news of Venus' divorce came out.

However, Venus divorced Hans not because of emotional breakdown, but to enroll their children in school.

Before they got married, Venus and Hans had agreed that children should be given priority in family life.

Hans said that he would like to adapt to Venus' career and move to China. For the education and growth of children, I am also willing to take care of my family.

In 2006, Venus enrolled her eldest son Dudu. Unexpectedly, the staff told her that "DuDu" needed to be re-registered because she was single at the time of adoption, but now there are foreigners in their family, which is an international adoption.

Handling international adoption procedures is cumbersome and takes a long time, but "DuDu" will go to school in a month, and Venus is so anxious that she almost gets angry on the spot.

The staff said airily, "Otherwise, you can get a divorce and don't bother to become a single mother."

Ok, let's get started.

Venus immediately called Hans, who was on a business trip overseas, and asked him to come back. It may be difficult for Germans to understand the divorce for their children's hukou, but he believes in Venus's decision.

A few days later, belt of venus took Hans into the Civil Affairs Bureau for divorce, and the staff inevitably asked the reasons for the divorce.

"Germany lost to Italy in the World Cup. I want to marry this German husband and an Italian. "

Although Venus's excuse was absurd at first, anything absurd happened to Venus, which seemed to add a little rationality.

After DuDu was admitted, Venus asked Hans: Do you want to get a marriage certificate again? Hans shook his head. Why not wait until all three children are enrolled? Anyway, their feelings will not be affected at all.

Venus smiled and nodded. This man really agrees with her idea. Maintaining marriage depends on the understanding, tolerance and joint efforts of two people, not a paper marriage certificate.

Although nominally divorced, Venus and Hans still live together, and nothing has changed at home except a marriage certificate and a divorce certificate.

In 20 18, Venus and Hans held a grand wedding in Italy. 13 years ago, they were so controversial that they had to hold a low-key wedding. Now they can finally make a scene.

Venus put on a gorgeous white wedding dress and accepted the blessings of the wedding guests. At this time, the children of Venus have already gone to middle school.

Venus home is a multilingual environment. Venus speaks Chinese to the children, Hans speaks German to the children, and Venus talks to Hans in English. Therefore, it is common for children to "mess up the language system", and often several languages pop up in one sentence at the same time.

The special status of transgender people will definitely put her under great pressure, and this pressure will also fall on her family. When Dudu was 8 years old, a classmate said to him, "Your mother used to be a man!" " "

After Dudu came home, he proudly said to Venus that he was calm and supercilious and asked the classmate directly, "So what?" None of your business! "

At the beginning, many people thought that Venus could not be a good mother, but would only harm the child's life.

Venus responded in the talk show. She thanked the public for their concern for children, which at least showed that everyone was good to children.

But she wants to ask, what is a "good mother"? What makes people think that she can't afford to be a mother? Venus believes that time will prove it for her and reveal all the answers.

Since 1995, Venus has completed the transformation from a man to a woman and experienced the transformation of being a wife and a mother.

Venus once said in an interview that her life is a huge performance art:

"This kind of performance art is not a day, but until I die. I use my life and my works to be a person and see how the society recognizes me and how to accept me. "

Venus is bound to be surrounded by many controversies, but she is obviously fearless. She is undoubtedly a brave person.

Her life is a miracle and a legend.

References: