Understanding Barnum Effect in College Romance

Understanding Barnum effect makes the person you love fall in love with you.

1 Barnum effect

How to use Barnum effect to make the person you love fall in love with you?

There is a psychological effect-"Barnum effect".

What it says is that it is easy for people to produce * * * sounds for general personality descriptions, which is thought to be very accurate.

For example, the constellation and blood type test we see in our life, after testing our income, feel amazing, completely talking about ourselves.

But can the constellation and blood type really determine your life? Not necessarily.

Just because each of us will firmly believe in one thing, then try to find all kinds of evidence to support our views, and finally form a hint to ourselves.

If Barnum effect can be applied to feelings, and the other party has trust in you, it will be easy to upgrade the relationship.

So how to use it?

The specific steps are as follows.

2 Use information points to cut in

0 1. Cut into each other's heart with an information point.

It is not easy to attack the opponent's defense simply by talking or meeting. We need to take time to explore each other's characteristics and make him feel that you know him best.

According to Barnum effect, we can draw the conclusion that most people may have unrealistic optimism about their personality and ability.

A smart person will stimulate the other person's consciousness and make the other person feel that when he is with you, he is constantly affirmed and encouraged, and the positive energy is bursting, then you are the one who understands him.

Let me give you an example. The boy said that his personality was incompatible and he wanted to end the relationship. He said that the girl didn't understand him. At first, all kinds of entanglement of girls were useless.

Later, the girl changed her strategy, collected a lot of the other person's recent situation and found that he was really under a lot of pressure recently.

Then at ten o'clock in the evening, send the other party a message like this:

The pursuit of victory deepened the relationship.

"You have worked too much overtime recently, and the pressure must be great. You are a strong person, you will think a lot about others and do everything yourself. "

"I also know that no matter how strong a person looks, there will still be times when he is weak inside. When he is tired, he will have a good rest. If you are so demanding of yourself, things will definitely develop in the direction you expect. Take care of yourself when you are pregnant. "

As soon as this was said, the attitude of the other party, which has been very cold, came to a 180 degree turn. Barnum effect has played a role, and boys are willing to communicate with their girlfriends, making the relationship further.

02. To pursue victory and deepen the relationship.

When the other person gradually relaxes his defense mechanism and starts to talk to you, all you need to do is hit him directly in the heart with his behavior.

For example, after getting closer, boys talk to you-

"When I was a child, my grades were good, and my parents had high expectations for me. I don't want others to see my fragile or imperfect self.

4 guide each other

At this point, you can return to:

"Before, I thought you were an omnipotent person. Later, I slowly discovered that your strength is fake. In fact, your heart is also very soft, and sometimes you feel very weak. You must be tired. Give you a hug.

This sentence is also taking advantage of the Barnum effect. Everyone will have a fragile heart, and the other person will think that you know him very well, and the intimacy between them will rise.

03. Continue to guide each other to develop in the way you want.

There are many couples who end their relationship because of problems in communication mode, such as a constant complaint and accusation and a constant lesson.

Such a situation, in fact, no matter how noisy, can not solve the essential problem.

On the positive side, the departure of one party is actually a process of repairing the relationship, and it is only an opportunity to change this wrong model.

For example, you have complained that the other person is not self-motivated, lazy and does not do housework, and is not confident enough, but after each complaint, the other person has not changed, and he is more and more disgusted with facing himself.

5 how to guide each other?

So how do you guide each other in the direction you want?

When you find the other person procrastinating and lazy, you can say:

"I know that you are a person with a stand and can firmly fight for your dreams."

When you feel that the other person is not confident and starts to shrink back, you can say:

"You know, I especially appreciate your independence and confidence. It was the same when you were promoted before. Because of this, I don't worry about the future when I want to be with you.

In fact, when communicating with each other, use positive language to skillfully turn each other's shortcomings into advantages.

And keep repeating and deepening such views until they are deeply rooted in each other. After a long time, the other party will really get better and better under your guidance and care more and more about your opinion.

In fact, this is a process of deepening love, thus bringing our intimate relationship closer.