A blind date said he didn't ask for it. Can't Yue Lao save him?

Guide: People who are dishonest about their mate selection conditions can't ask you when they are alive. Vague mate selection conditions may indicate your vague and tortuous life in the future.

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Because I work in a school, there are some resources for young male and female teachers around me, so someone always asks me for an introduction.

But when asked about their mate selection conditions, some people always seem very shy. Men will say: It doesn't matter what they look like, the key is to be sensible, kind and filial. The woman will say: it doesn't matter if you have money or not, as long as you are honest.

Every time I meet someone who says that, I really feel big.

In my opinion, it is best not to mention such conditions.

Often this seemingly easy-going and low-demanding person is actually the most difficult to guess, but it is difficult to introduce to each other, and the success rate is extremely low.

So when I meet such people, I can't help teasing them.

I usually say: What a coincidence! We have a girl who lives in the countryside here. She is simple and kind, and her two younger brothers are still at school. I am very filial to my parents. I have to transfer half of my salary to my family every month and try my best to help my parents bear part of the financial pressure. It's hard to find such a filial and honest person these days. Why don't you arrange a meeting?

But when almost all people heard me list these conditions, they immediately beat gongs and drums and faltered and said, why don't you remove the condition of "filial piety" ("sincerity") and look at others?

After further discussion, it is possible to get in touch with their real thoughts bit by bit and get a general idea of what they really want.

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There are two kinds of people, and the conditions for choosing a spouse seem simple and have no specific requirements.

The first kind of people, they may not have really thought about what their dream lover should look like.

They have no habit of independent thinking, and have long been brainwashed by the surrounding social atmosphere and other people's values. The conditions they said are nothing but platitudes inherited from their elders.

They never face up to their real needs, but are used to taking the needs of their parents and family as their own needs.

Men ask women to be filial, not to be filial to their parents, but to be filial to their parents-in-law after marriage, respectful and obedient, and to take good care of their parents-in-law without complaining before they get sick.

The honesty required by girls is not real moral integrity, but obedience to their wives, not asking questions that should not be asked. It is best to just bow their heads to earn money, never interfere with the woman's help to her parents, or even act as a "helper."

In fact, no matter for men or women, the conditions they put forward are not the result of their careful consideration, but only for their own interests, not for the purpose of building an equal and harmonious marriage.

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Another kind of people, in fact, are very aware of their own needs, but they are afraid of being inconsistent with the mainstream values recognized by society, afraid to put their real needs on the table, and afraid of being identified as selfish, shallow and vulgar.

They want to be recognized by others, so they can only hide their real needs with some very high-sounding and popular statements.

Just like a video I watched before, what is the ideal goal of street interview for boys? Basically, the answers are virtuous, considerate, kind and filial. Only one boy said he wanted to be young and beautiful, but he was scolded by a bunch of people.

In fact, I think the real reason why he was scolded is that he is the only one who tells the truth among a group of people who speak standard answers, so he makes others hate his truth and worry that his true desires will be exposed.

But if everyone hides their real needs when choosing a spouse, it will only make life more and more difficult and dreams more and more difficult to realize.

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There was once a girl I knew, and she knew her mate selection conditions very well. She never hides when people ask her. She admits that she likes boys who are tall and thin, have white skin, have no obvious acne marks on their faces, love cleanliness, don't wear eyes, don't smoke, and have good hands.

It also excludes some specific occupations and one or two specific constellations.

Everyone was very surprised to hear her visual criteria for choosing a spouse. They said behind her back that this girl is so picky, maybe she doesn't really want to find someone, wait until she is single.

Not long after, the girl really met this person and released a signal to him without saying anything. The other party responded without hesitation. The relationship between the two was confirmed at the first meeting.

After more than two months in a different place, the man finished everything on his side and came to the city where the woman was. When they met again, they went to get a marriage certificate.

Now more than a year has passed, and the two are still making up for the love that they didn't have time to talk slowly before. Feelings are as thick as honey.

When a person outlines the image of his future partner in his mind, and happens to meet the right person in real life, which coincides with this outline, then his heart will have a sense of satisfaction, which is enough to support his stay for a long time in the future.

And every time I think back to the first moment, I can't help but raise my mouth, just like a child got a big jar of unexpected sugar, and his heart was full of surprises, as if he had won the best prize in the world.

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It's best for each of us to recognize ourselves as early as possible, be as true as possible in choosing a spouse, be responsible for ourselves, and try to find a future partner according to our inner thoughts.

Because if what you want is never satisfied, it will always exist in your subconscious mind, and it will come out at the first opportunity to try to subvert your life.

I once saw a gentle couple when I was shopping. Both of them exude a strong academic atmosphere and their temperament fits well.

But the boy in this couple kept staring at a nearby beautiful woman sticking out from the front until the other person walked away while her partner was trying on clothes.

Looking at the yearning in this boy's eyes, I understand that although the present partner is the most suitable for him in all aspects, what he really wants is another type.

Only now, for various reasons, he can't or dare not choose what he wants, so he chooses what he can accept at present and suits him.

But his desire for that kind of hot beauty will never disappear, which will prompt him to strive for this type to make up for what he owes in the future if conditions permit.

Instead, we should recognize the truth as soon as possible, be kind in this matter, don't mistreat ourselves, don't delay others, and don't get the "Bai Yueguang" but still reminisce about the old "Zhu Shazhi".

I wish everyone can finally find their dream lover in this bustling world.